The End of Porter

  There's this Jeff Foxworthy joke, where he and his brother are kids and they're wrestlin' and they break their Daddy's Jack Daniels Elvis decanter. The punchline is, "This is why we can't have nice things!" My mom collects stuff like that, she's got her John Wayne collectors plate and such, so it was a running joke in our house while I was growing up.

So, a few Christmases ago, my mom gives me this statue of Porter Wagoner. He's the guy who made Dolly Parton who she is today, he gave her her big break, and is an amazing singer in his own right. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bq1kEph-wvs

It was on Matt's desk, and yesterday I found the destroyed base with one little foot, a little purple boot on it, the microphone hanging by a wire, with Porter's hand still grasping it firmly. The rest of the body is MIA. Moxie strikes again. I don't know how or when, but she managed to completely destroy it.

You can probably guess my reaction.

"This is why we can't have nice things!"

RIP Porter. Again. You guarded my kitchen nicely. Hopefully, I'll find the rest of your remains today and can give you a proper burial.
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